Have I Mentioned How Much I Hate HTML?

I want to change the look of my blog and have been 'researching' how to customize it. I shut it all down last night when my eyes started to bleed and I swore no less than 3 times at some lady blogger who told me it was as easy as pie (that should have been my first clue. Have you ever actually tried to make pie crust that didn't turn out to be 2 inches thick and tasted like you were eating gluey flour and water baked on high for 15 minutes? Easy as pie my a...).

I've been on all sorts of blogs that look like their owners most likely have 38 scrapbook photo albums for each of their children. (I have none....scrapbook albums, not kids. I have plenty of those.) And these bloggers swear they haven't paid someone to make their blogs all perfectly wonderful. I admit it. I have blogger's envy. Argh. They probably have perfect houses and perfect children too.

What have I gotten myself into? I started blogging as an outlet for frustrations, connect with family and friends, and just to be able to write and have some 'me' moments in my hectic life with four kids, two dogs and a husband (not necessarily in order of importance there). And now I'm worrying about 'my blog isn't as nice as her blog'?

Okay. Breathe. I do not want to change the look of my blog to compete with the 10 million other blogs in cyberspace. I want to change the look of my blog because I want to. I can picture it in my head but can't make the computer believe that's really what I want to do. The computer keeps laughing at me and thinks it's a game. "Oh, really? You want to widen those margins? 'Kay.....but that must mean you don't want this pesky side bar, here, so I'll just get rid of that for you."

Stupid HTML.

I'm begging for help. Don't make me have to go to blogging rehab. Don't make me take up scrap booking. Please....send me your links to stress free blogging designs. Send me info on how to have the upper hand with my computer. Is there a secret swear word I don't know about?

Epiphany. There's an underground secret code that all you HTML lovers know about, isn't there! All you HTML lovers know just where to insert that little code in amongst all that HTML gibberish. And then the computer sees that little secret code and says, "Ah, crap. Gotta listen to this one. They know what they're doing."

Give me the code. I won't tell anyone. Promise.

I'll bake you some pumpkin scones??